The Need for Help

Fr. Williams Onyilo, CSSp.

To help is to make something easier or possible for someone by offering one’s services or resources. As human beings, we are not gifted in all areas of life. At different times, we need the help of others-those who are gifted where we are not, or even in areas where we ourselves are gifted but have grown tired.

Even though this is a simple truth, there are persons who do not see the need to ask for help, even when they are exhausted or struggling. Psychologists often describe such individuals as “soloists,” sometimes linked to imposter syndrome-people who believe that asking for help is a sign of incompetence, and that needing support diminishes their worth or the value of their work.

This attitude can stem from various experiences. One is hyper-independence, often a response to early neglect or forced self-reliance, where asking for help feels unsafe or shameful. Another is the fear of vulnerability or rejection-the assumption that seeking help will lead to judgment or dismissal.

However, the Scriptures present a different perspective. In the first reading, the people of Macedonia were not ashamed to ask for help. In their need, they prayed, and God stirred Paul through a vision to come to their aid-and he responded willingly.

Paul himself was not ashamed to have Timothy as his companion and helper. In the Old Testament, Moses had Aaron as his spokesperson (Exodus 4:14–16). Even our Lord Jesus Christ accepted help on His way to Calvary-from Simon of Cyrene and Veronica-and found consolation in the presence of His mother Mary and John at the foot of the cross. From the very beginning, God acknowledged man’s need for help, saying, “It is not good for the man to be alone,” and so He created Eve as a suitable partner (Genesis 2:18).

Little wonder the Book of Ecclesiastes reminds us that two are better than one: they support each other, strengthen each other, and stand together against adversity. A cord of three strands is not easily broken (Ecclesiastes 4:9–12).

Hence, we all need help. No one is an island. The humility to ask for help and the generosity to offer it are both signs of strength, not weakness.

May the Holy Spirit teach us to rely on one another in love and to follow His guidance through Christ our Lord. Amen.